MAKE A CHOICE - HARD OR HARD! 😄

I often think about how people prepare for mediation | workplace conflict resolution.


I think it's because our preparation is deeply influenced by cultural conditioning and traditional norms. 


Most are fixated on legal arguments, who am I up against..., and position papers, thinking they're the sole keys to success- easy, right?


Let me share three unconventional aspects of preparation:

💡 Anticipating Triggers and Responses: Instead of solely focusing on legal strategies, prepare how you'll respond to attacks, my way or the highway, or lack of respect triggers. 

💡 Embracing a Growth Mindset: How can you approach conflict with curiosity, resilience, and a commitment to learning and improvement? Shifting your mindset from fixed to growth-oriented fosters adaptability and innovation in conflict resolution.

💡 Becoming Your Best Self: How can you prepare your emotions and mindset to show up as the best version of yourself? What strategies will you develop to maintain your best self, even under stress, uncertainty or adversity?


In 2014, I became a mediator. I further trained in advanced mediation and FDRP and attended Harvard's "Negotiation, Leadership and How To Handle Difficult Conversations. " It was hard (and costly)!


I had already spent a lifetime learning how to resolve conflict because I learned how NOT to resolve conflict growing up. 


Conflict resolution is personal and professional. I want to optimise people's well-being, performance, skills, and relationships and improve conflict outcomes.


No, not with Kumbaya, holding hands and singing songs... 🤮


But there is a better way than the traditional norms through cultural conditioning.


I have invested a lifetime of personal development and in the more formal learnings that propelled me to pivot, often standing on my own, to help people (as a mediator) stop preparing for and approaching mediation the traditional way.


It has been hard as I continuously feel like I'm challenging conventional norms and advocating for unconventional preparation and approach, and there has been a lot of pushback and negativity. 


But I want you to know that unconventional preparation (preparing yourself and the other human elements that show up in conflict and the legal elements, too) may seem hard and uncomfortable, and it is.


But it's so rewarding when, as a mediator, you see people perform at the next level, having boosted their relationships and confidence and achieved transformative outcomes, happy with the results. 


AND it's also hard when you prepare the traditional way because you're leaving yourself exposed to the BIG human obstacles without a plan for managing yourself or others. Now, that's extremely hard!


So, STOP preparing for mediation... the conventional way and choose the unconventional path that challenges you to grow and excel. 


You get to choose what uncomfortable "hard" you want!